Keeping the Channels Open

It's Friday and lately I've been getting more spam than ever. Some with the worst subject lines EVER. They get through my meager spam blocker by adding letters to the spelling of certain verbs or even getting creative, Avril Lavine style, by adding numbers, as in "Sk8ter Boi." My favorite subject line for a spam I received was "FREE COCAINE!" I laughed out loud when I got it. I thought of the poor sap who saw that in their inbox and said, "You mean it??" Aw, yeah!

When I checked in with my e-mail this morning, the usual momentous amounts of mail were waiting for me. I went through and marked them all as spam, and then found one shining true e-mail waiting for me. ONE SINGLE GLOWING E-MAIL in a sea of pharmacy offers, and viagra excitement, and Summer, Increase your penis size. It was from one of those friends that I think is hilarious, and I think actually thinks I am kind of funny, but we have never made a go of it beyond that. One of those friends, who you might have built forts with, or started a well respected indie band with if the circumstances had prevailed. He moved to Oregon, and might have read my blog (hi Filofax!), and sent me this very very beautiful quote that has been often writ in internet blogs of creatives. It's that quote by Martha Graham that talks about your life force, and just letting it come, not questioning it. I've read it many times and every time something else gets me. This time the last lines hit me: It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.

Dang it! ANOTHER thing that tells me: Let go, you damn fool! You're holding on white knuckle tight, and there's nothing to do about it! If you let go, you will find you are ALREADY doing your job!

And so here we are, wading through the usual spam, the CRAP, the shit that fills the inboxes of our minds. If there is one message that can come through, one GLOWING GOLD, TRUTH that can make it through, I think we are still winning.