Early In the Week, and I'm in Trouble
Allright, I hate to be a downer, but this week totally blows. I know what you're saying, BUT IT'S ONLY TUESDAY. MORNING. To which I say, EXACTLY.
I've had migraines almost everyday for about a 10 days straight--in varying degrees. Yesterday I had a reprieve, but by the afternoon, due to stress, I had another one galloping into the pasture of my head and now here it sits. No meds to help, and all the work in the world to do. Not only that, but work is scary with things unknown and my sudden uncanny ability to screw up left and right with my boss. It's been a LONG TIME since I've felt so inadequate. I feel like saying to her, "You know, I don't know what to tell you, but obviously there's something that I am reacting to, that is making me seem dim, clumsy, and utterly useless. I swear to you that I am normally quite capable."
Then there's a rather terrible personal situation happening and I don't want to get into the particulars, but it is making me miserable, prone to anxiety attacks and occasional weeping. Again, it is a long time since I've felt so inept. I feel like saying to the other person involved, "You know, I don't know what to tell you, but obviously there's something in this situation that is making me seem dim, clumsy, and utterly useless. I swear to you that normally I appear to have a heart and a brain."
To quote Anne Lamott: Once again, I am the world's largest toddler.
I've been seeking advice, prayers, and ice cream. Graham took me out to dinner last night because I came home totally wrecked. God bless boyfriends that take you out to dinner. They are the unsung heroes. Also, sometimes having someone be an audience to your impromptu comedic monologues about how awful your day is, totally makes a difference. Yesterday, I spun a doozy of a one woman show to my friend and co-worker, Mindy. Thank God she laughs and interjects her own humor, otherwise Graham might have had to take me to the LOONY BIN, instead of an outdoor restaurant for barbecued ribs and tossed salad.
And the world goes on. I played guitar this morning and that helped. Feeling the sun on my back helps. Remembering that even the best people can sometimes be a**holes helps. I am looking forward to another day, where heads don't hurt, tasks get accomplished, and I am not walking around feeling like the back end of an otherwise decent person.
I've had migraines almost everyday for about a 10 days straight--in varying degrees. Yesterday I had a reprieve, but by the afternoon, due to stress, I had another one galloping into the pasture of my head and now here it sits. No meds to help, and all the work in the world to do. Not only that, but work is scary with things unknown and my sudden uncanny ability to screw up left and right with my boss. It's been a LONG TIME since I've felt so inadequate. I feel like saying to her, "You know, I don't know what to tell you, but obviously there's something that I am reacting to, that is making me seem dim, clumsy, and utterly useless. I swear to you that I am normally quite capable."
Then there's a rather terrible personal situation happening and I don't want to get into the particulars, but it is making me miserable, prone to anxiety attacks and occasional weeping. Again, it is a long time since I've felt so inept. I feel like saying to the other person involved, "You know, I don't know what to tell you, but obviously there's something in this situation that is making me seem dim, clumsy, and utterly useless. I swear to you that normally I appear to have a heart and a brain."
To quote Anne Lamott: Once again, I am the world's largest toddler.
I've been seeking advice, prayers, and ice cream. Graham took me out to dinner last night because I came home totally wrecked. God bless boyfriends that take you out to dinner. They are the unsung heroes. Also, sometimes having someone be an audience to your impromptu comedic monologues about how awful your day is, totally makes a difference. Yesterday, I spun a doozy of a one woman show to my friend and co-worker, Mindy. Thank God she laughs and interjects her own humor, otherwise Graham might have had to take me to the LOONY BIN, instead of an outdoor restaurant for barbecued ribs and tossed salad.
And the world goes on. I played guitar this morning and that helped. Feeling the sun on my back helps. Remembering that even the best people can sometimes be a**holes helps. I am looking forward to another day, where heads don't hurt, tasks get accomplished, and I am not walking around feeling like the back end of an otherwise decent person.
posted by Summer Pierre at
9:53 AM
2 Comments:
sending you some love m'dear...from the land of sun and
leaf blowers.
getting closer to ny everyday.
I'll get right on the Zomeg thang.You are so brave to tough out your pain while dealing with the temp-est, a precarious place where angels fear to tread. You are sorely missed here.
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