Disneyland

Where to even begin?

Disneyland is a TRIP and a HALF. It’s a bit like New York—crowded, great architecture, and expensive as hell. On the other hand, it’s also much WHITER (or should I say PINKER) than New York City, and the people there are unbelievably nice and helpful, and they keep the place clean.

In case you forgot for even a second that you were in an ENCHANTING place, they pumped chiming orchestrated music everywhere you went. I wouldn’t have minded this, but I lost my cell phone the first night we were there, and I was HAUNTED by what I thought was my cell phone ringing from the dead. I kept lurching to get it, and then catching myself.

Also, since I’d been there, they had taken the mouse ears to a WHOLE NEW LEVEL. They now had such exciting themes as Captain Jack Sparrow mouse ears, with an earring in the ear, and brown ropes of dreadlocks hanging from the rim of the cap. There were pink princess sparkly cone ears for all those princesses out there (I was traveling with one of them). I stood in line at Star Tours and saw a six-foot man, with lobstered skin and red hair, with a Rastafarian pair of mouse ears. This particular pair was colored red, yellow, and green, and had fake dreadlocks hanging from the cap. He kept shaking the dreads at his friends as if to say, “Don’t I look CRAZY?” I felt like saying, yes, you do look crazy, and don’t let me get started on how many rules of esthetic decency you are breaking. Alas, it was just ANOTHER example of how I needed to check my UPTIGHT artistic sensibilities at the gate. Disneyland wasn’t just a vacation for some, it was a WAY OF LIFE.

But I am being just a smart aleck. I was taken in MANY TIMES by the joy that this place can facilitate. I was shocked by how moved I was by seeing Lily hug people in costumes. Upon hearing that she was going to Disneyland, Lily had said, “Oh, Minnie will be so HAPPY to see me!” I almost started bawling when Lily curled her little body up against Minnie, with such shy delight. It was so sweet and so full of love.

Also, I thought I had lived until I rode Star Tours with my six-year-old brother Luke, who gave a thumbs up when the pilot robot came on screen and then proceeded to hoot and holler at ever dip and dive of the ship. He gave the usher a high five as we passed him on our second run. It was more fun than I had in ages.

Other highlights include riding It’s a Small World ride, and getting to experience the GORGEOUS designs of illustrator Mary Blair in a whole new way. Since researching her and really loving her work, the design of this ride was breathtaking. It was like being INSIDE a giant Mary Blair illustration.

We waited in line for a private audience with Mickey mouse, which ended up delighting Janae I think more than the kids. She loved Mickey! She couldn’t get enough of him! Afterwards she just kept saying “Wow! That was SOMETHING!”

I STILL think Pirates of the Caribbean is the BEST RIDE—even with the additions and changes made by the film. When we passed the scene where the prisoners are trying to tempt the dog with the keys in his mouth, a kid behind me, who’s voice hadn’t changed yet, chirped: “Hey! I remember that from the movie!” When I saw the Johnny Depp with eyeliner robot, I wondered how many years it would take for a kid to stumble along the movie and say, “Hey, I remember that guy from the ride at Disneyland!” If Disney has anything to say about it, probably not in my lifetime.