Summer Pierre, you have survived two nights of no heat, a cat's illness, and countless moments of existential crisis, now what are you going to do?

I am going to Disneyland!

It's hard to believe that next week at this time I will be in the (hopefully) warm climate of Anaheim, California, running around with my little brother and sister and their mom, Janae, at the HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH. That's right people, I am going to Disneyland.

This is something that Janae mentioned doing when Luke was just a few evolutionary steps away from being a grub, and Lily wasn't even a twinkle in the eye yet. My dad had said something in response like NO WAY IN HECK WILL YOU CATCH ME THERE, and I had said, TAKE ME! TAKE ME! Here we are six years and an additional child later, and we have our airplane tickets booked, our motel reservations in place, and our three day passes in hand.

The "cool person" in me would roll my eyes at the thought of partaking in a place synonymous with blatant commercialism, but I learned long ago that it is impossible to maintain that cool persona around my little brother and sister. Nothing says, TAKE ME TAKE ME like the thought of doing something so FREE and SPAZZY like a weekend with them at the ultimate playground. Plus, I get to be reunited with such rides like the Jungle Boat and Pirate of the Caribbean.

The last time I was there was 17 years ago, and I was milking the last strands of whatever "childhood" remained, with my grandmother. At 17, I knew I was already too old, but I wanted to go anyway--kind of like when you are 13 and you go trick-or-treating (not like I know what that's like or anything). You know it's your last possible chance to say, "Hey grandma, will you take me to Disneyland?" and still get away with it. I wanted to go and experience a ride that nobody seems to have any memory of, but I loved, called The Incredible Shrinking Machine. It was one of the original rides, so it still had the 60's feel to it. You sat in a blue car and a voice narrated the process of you being shot by a ray that would cause you to "shrink". Suddenly, snowflakes got larger, and molecules started appearing. My favorite part was when you saw a GIANT BLUE EYE looking down at you from what was supposed to be the lens of a microscope. It was COOL and FREAKY. Unfortunately, like my own innocence, it had been RIPPED OUT and replaced with a much more UPDATED invention.

I remember I waited an hour and a half for the submarine, just so I could pretend for a moment that mermaids were real (something I often fantasized about). I also waited an hour to go on the then-new Star Tours ride. While I waited in line, a blond kid from Missouri struck up a conversation with me, and took my picture with his Kodak Disc Camera. Somewhere in Missouri, a grainy picture of me in a captain's hat and a Hard Rock Cafe t-shirt exists.

As of right now Luke and Lily have NO IDEA that not only will they be going to Disneyland, but I will be joining them. Janae is going to wait until the last minute to tell them so she only hears "When are we going?" for at least 24-48 hours. Sometimes I feel like crank calling her and saying those exact words over and over again.

I can't wait.