It's Always there For You

I have an incredible amount of change happening all at once, and I have been waking up everyday with this sense of onslaught. Onslaught of activity, onslaught of have-tos, onslaught of check lists. Last night I went to pick up my guitar for a little stress relief noodling and discovered that one of my cats in chase of a fly had knocked down a picture from the wall, and broken a key part of my guitar. This is a guitar that has belonged to my father since 1968, and is considered valuable, but is priceless to me. My blood went cold when I inspected it. A list of meanings went through me: costly repair when I am going through a very expensive period of my life, finding a good place for repairs when I don't know of any here in New York, the overwhelm of another thing that needs my IMMEDIATE attention.

But this is life. Immediately. Shit ALWAYS happens, doesn't it? You don't need it to be busy to have life galloping in and sending you dizzy.

This weekend I am going to Vermont and although the IDEA of it overwhelms me, the reality is, it won't hurt to have some quiet hours on a train and time with friends by a swimming hole. Maple flavored soft serve ice cream doesn't hurt either.

You'll have to forgive me people if I am going through long bouts of silences here. I always get worried about not writing in here, losing an audience, and being FORGOTTEN. But the truth is, when people say to me, "I haven't read your blog in awhile." I say to them (with tongue in cheek), "It's always there for you." Why can't it always be there for ME?

After I tend to my guitar, and get some other things done I plan to go outside and take my shoes off and feel the wind in my toes. I'll also continue to re-read To Kill a Mockingbird. Maybe drink ice water with a fresh sprig of mint. Maybe go for a walk in the evening and look in on all the golden windows of homes settling in for the night. Maybe send out a little prayer: help help help and thank you thank you thank you.